Navigating the Holidays in a Divorced Family: Finding Joy and Balance
December 5, 2023

The holiday season is often depicted as a time of warmth, togetherness, and celebration. However, for families navigating the challenges of divorce, this time of year can bring about a unique set of emotions and logistical hurdles. It's essential to recognize that you can still create meaningful and joyous holiday experiences for your children and yourself, even in a divorced family. In this blog post, we'll explore some practical tips and strategies to make the most of the holidays in a divorced family.


Plan Ahead and Communicate:

The key to a successful holiday season in a divorced family is communication and planning. Start by discussing your plans with your ex-spouse well in advance. Be open and honest about your expectations and desires for the holiday season. By doing so, you can work together to create a schedule that accommodates both parents' needs and ensures your children can spend quality time with each parent.


Be Flexible:

Flexibility is crucial when navigating holidays in a divorced family. Sometimes, circumstances may change, and it's essential to adapt to these changes gracefully. If something unexpected arises, try to find a solution that works for everyone involved. Remember, the primary focus should be on creating a positive and memorable experience for your children.


Create New Traditions:

Divorce often brings changes, and that includes holiday traditions. Instead of clinging to the past, embrace the opportunity to create new traditions that reflect your family's current dynamics. It could be something as simple as cooking a special meal together, volunteering as a family, or taking a weekend trip to a new destination.


Prioritize Your Children's Well-being:

While it's essential to take care of yourself during the holidays, remember that your children's well-being should always come first. Be mindful of the impact that your actions and decisions can have on them. Make sure they know that both parents love them and are committed to providing a happy and stable holiday experience.

 

Manage Expectations:

It's essential to manage your own and your children's expectations during the holiday season. Divorce can bring changes in financial circumstances and living arrangements, which may affect the way you celebrate. Be honest with your children about any limitations, but emphasize the importance of the love and connection that the holidays represent.


Celebrate Separately but Together:

If spending the holidays together is not possible or comfortable, consider celebrating separately but together in spirit. Encourage your children to create homemade cards or gifts for their other parent. This can help them feel a sense of connection even when physically apart.


Seek Support:

The holiday season can be emotionally challenging for both parents and children in divorced families. Don't hesitate to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist if needed. Talking to someone who understands your situation can provide valuable emotional support and guidance.


Navigating the holidays in a divorced family may have its challenges, but with communication, flexibility, and a focus on your children's well-being, you can create positive and memorable holiday experiences. Remember that divorce doesn't mean the end of meaningful celebrations – it's an opportunity to embrace change, create new traditions, and find joy in the moments you share with your loved ones.


This post was written by Chelle Hendershot, Registered Mediator at Hope For Our Future, LLC. This is not intended to be legal advice and is for advertising purposes only.

Related Post

July 7, 2025
Talking to children about divorce is one of the hardest conversations a parent can face. You may be filled with your own emotions—guilt, sadness, worry—but your child needs your calm, honest, and age-appropriate guidance to make sense of what’s happening. No matter how old they are, kids need reassurance that they are loved and that the divorce is not their fault. Here’s how to talk to children about divorce in a way that supports their development and emotional well-being—tailored to their age and stage. Toddlers and Preschoolers (Ages 1–5) At this age, children won’t fully understand what divorce means, but they will sense stress and changes in their routine. They need simple explanations and consistent reassurance. What to say: “Mommy and Daddy are going to live in different houses. You didn’t do anything wrong. We both love you and will always take care of you.” What helps: Keep routines as consistent as possible. Use books or toys to help explain changes. Expect regressions in behavior—this is a normal way they process change. Avoid negative talk about the other parent. Early Elementary (Ages 6–9) Kids this age can understand that divorce means their parents won’t live together anymore, but they may still believe it’s their fault. They often worry about what will happen to them and may feel torn between both parents. What to say: “We both love you, and we’ve decided we won’t be married anymore. It’s not your fault. You’ll still get to spend time with both of us.” What helps: Be prepared to repeat information often. Answer questions calmly, even if they’re asked repeatedly. Let them know it’s okay to love both parents. Give them ways to stay connected to each parent, like a shared journal or photo book. Tweens (Ages 10–12) Older children can understand more about relationships and may want more details. They may feel angry, embarrassed, or worry about what their friends will think. This age group benefits from honesty and a chance to express their emotions. What to say: “We’ve had problems for a while, and we’ve decided this is the best choice for our family. We know it’s a big change, and we’re here to talk whenever you need.” What helps: Acknowledge their feelings—even if they’re negative. Avoid putting them in the middle or asking them to take sides. Give them a sense of control, like letting them help decorate their new bedroom or choose the calendar for parenting time. Watch for withdrawal or changes in school or social behavior. Teens (Ages 13–18) Teens understand complex emotions and may have strong opinions. They might blame one parent, shut down emotionally, or try to take on adult responsibilities. Some may act like they don’t care, but underneath, they are often deeply affected. What to say: “We know this affects you, and we want to be open and honest. You don’t have to take sides. We’ll keep working together to make things as stable as possible for you.” What helps: Encourage open dialogue but don’t force it. Give them time and space to process. Continue to set boundaries and expectations—don’t let guilt lower your parenting standards. Consider counseling if they’re struggling. Tips for Every Age Be a united front. If possible, plan what you’ll say together and talk to your child as a team. Stick to age-appropriate language. Avoid oversharing adult details. Reassure them often. Kids need to hear that both parents love them and that things will be okay. Keep communication open. Let them know they can always come to you with questions. Take care of yourself. Children pick up on your stress. Make space for your own healing so you can support theirs. Final Thoughts Your child doesn’t need a perfect explanation—they need your love, honesty, and support. Divorce is a huge life transition, but with thoughtful communication and consistency, kids can adapt and even thrive. You don’t have to have all the answers. Just being present and listening can make all the difference. If you're co-parenting, it’s also helpful to keep your message consistent between homes. When both parents commit to supporting the child emotionally, it lays the foundation for resilience and emotional health. This post was written by Chelle Hendershot, who is a dedicated Mediator, Guardian ad Litem, and Parenting Coordinator at Hope For Our Future, LLC, with a passion for helping individuals and families navigate through life's most challenging moments. This post is not intended to be legal advice and is for marketing purposes only. Photo Credit: 2856770 Childhood Stages Thomas Perkins Dreamstime.com
July 2, 2025
When summer rolls around, there’s a lot of pressure to make it memorable. Social media is filled with big vacations and expensive outings but the truth is, kids don’t need fancy trips to have fun. They just need your time, a little imagination, and a chance to explore. Backyard adventures can be some of the most meaningful moments for kids no packing, no driving, and no entrance fees required. Whether you’re a full-time parent or co-parenting with a schedule, these easy ideas can fit into almost any day. Here are some simple and budget-friendly backyard activities to try this summer. 1. Backyard Obstacle Course Use what you already have pool noodles, hula hoops, boxes, or jump ropes to build an obstacle course. Let your kids help design it and take turns timing each other. Add a sprinkler at the end for a splashy finish. 2. DIY Nature Scavenger Hunt Make a list of simple things to find: a red leaf, a bug, something soft, something round. Print it out or draw it together. This is a great activity for all ages and can turn an ordinary yard into a world of discovery. 3. Campout at Home Set up a tent or make a fort with blankets under the stars. Add flashlights, s'mores in the microwave, and some campfire stories. You don’t have to sleep outside to make it magical. 4. Sidewalk Chalk Art Festival Give kids chalk and let them turn the driveway into an art gallery. Add a twist with chalk games like hopscotch, four-square, or drawing prompts (“draw your dream pet”). 5. Water Balloon Piñata Fill balloons with water, tie them from a tree branch, and take turns swinging at them with a plastic bat or stick. It’s fun, hilarious, and perfect for a hot afternoon. 6. Mud Kitchen or Nature Play Station Old pots, pans, spoons, and a little dirt and water can keep little ones busy for hours. Add flowers, leaves, or food coloring for extra fun. Let them make “recipes” and serve you backyard delicacies. 7. Backyard Movie Night Use a sheet and a projector (or just a laptop on a table) and show a family movie outside. Popcorn, pillows, and blankets turn it into a full event. This works great for parenting time evenings. 8. Bug or Bird Watching Station Set up a small observation zone with binoculars, a notebook, and a bird guide or app. Encourage kids to draw or write down what they see. It’s a quiet activity that builds focus and wonder. 9. Lemonade Stand (Even If It’s Just for You) Let kids make and decorate their own lemonade stand even if they’re just serving the family. It’s a fun way to play pretend, practice math, and feel a sense of accomplishment. 10. Frozen Toy Rescue Freeze small toys in a container of water. Give your child tools like spoons, salt, or spray bottles to “rescue” the toys from the ice. It’s simple sensory fun and science rolled into one. Why These Moments Matter You don’t need to go anywhere to make memories. When children look back on summer, it’s the laughs, the silliness, and the time spent together that they’ll remember most. These activities are also great for building connection during parenting time transitions, helping children feel grounded and safe. Backyard fun gives you a way to be fully present no distractions, no stress, just joy. This post was written by Chelle Hendershot, who is a dedicated Mediator, Guardian ad Litem, and Parenting Coordinator at Hope For Our Future, LLC, with a passion for helping individuals and families navigate through life's most challenging moments. This post is not intended to be legal advice and is for marketing purposes only. Photo Credit: 147432855 Marysmn Dreamstime.com