The holidays can be one of the most joyful times of the year—but for divorced or separated parents, they can also bring a unique mix of emotions. The desire to make the season magical for your children is still there, but so are new schedules, shared parenting time, and sometimes, the ache of not being together for every moment.

Even with these challenges, the Christmas season can still be a time of connection, gratitude, and joy. It just takes a little creativity, communication, and flexibility.

1. Focus on Connection, Not the Calendar

It’s easy to get stuck on the idea that Christmas must be celebrated on December 25th. But what truly matters to kids is not the date—it’s the experience.

If your child spends Christmas Day with the other parent, create your own special celebration on another day. Call it “Christmas Morning, Round Two” or “Our Family Christmas.” Let your child know that every time they celebrate, it’s a chance to make new memories—not a replacement for the other parent’s time.

Tip: Treat your celebration just like the real thing—pajamas, hot cocoa, music, and presents. The consistency and excitement will help your child feel like they get two holidays instead of one.

2. Communicate and Plan Ahead

Nothing adds stress to the holidays faster than last-minute confusion. Review your parenting time order early—many Indiana parenting time schedules have specific holiday rotation guidelines.

If you and your co-parent can work together, plan who will have the children on which days and coordinate pick-up times in advance. Share travel plans, gift ideas, and even holiday wish lists to prevent overlap and miscommunication.

And remember, even if your relationship with your co-parent is strained, modeling calm and respectful communication sets a powerful example for your children.

3. Keep Old Traditions—But Add New Ones

Some traditions—like decorating the tree or baking cookies—can stay the same, even if they happen in a new setting. Kids find comfort in familiar routines, so try to keep a few favorite traditions alive in both homes.

At the same time, this is the perfect opportunity to create new traditions that reflect your family’s new beginning. A few ideas include:

• Holiday Movie Night: Make hot cocoa, snuggle up, and watch your favorite holiday films together.
• Christmas Lights Adventure: Drive around to see local light displays—Greencastle, Terre Haute, and Indianapolis all have wonderful options.
• Giving Back Together: Volunteer or donate toys to a local charity. Helping others builds gratitude and creates meaningful memories.
• Memory Ornaments: Each year, have your child pick or make an ornament that represents something special from the past year.
• New Year’s Eve Countdown Jar: Write small notes of favorite memories or accomplishments from the year and read them together before midnight.

These new moments don’t replace the old—they build on them.

4. Help Children Manage Transitions Between Homes

Switching homes during the holidays can be emotional for children. They may feel excitement, sadness, or even guilt for leaving one parent to be with the other.

You can make transitions smoother by:

• Packing familiar comfort items like a favorite blanket or stuffed animal.
• Helping them stay connected—encourage phone calls or short video chats with the other parent.
• Avoiding negative talk or guilt trips—remind your child that it’s okay to love both homes and both parents.

5. Focus on What You Can Control

It’s normal to feel sadness or frustration during the holidays, but remember: your energy sets the tone. Children pick up on tension quickly, so try to stay positive, flexible, and patient.

If you find the holidays emotionally difficult, make time for self-care—connect with friends, attend a community event, or take a quiet evening to rest and reflect.

Final Thoughts

Christmas after divorce may look different, but different doesn’t have to mean less joyful. With open communication, planning, and a focus on connection, you can create new holiday memories your children will cherish for years to come.

The most meaningful traditions aren’t about perfection—they’re about love, laughter, and time spent together. No matter which house the stockings hang in, what your children will remember most is the warmth they feel in both homes.

This post was written by Chelle Hendershot, who is a dedicated Mediator, Guardian ad Litem, and Parenting Coordinator at Hope For Our Future, LLC, with a passion for helping individuals and families navigate through life's most challenging moments. This post is not intended to be legal advice and is for marketing purposes only.

Photo credit 

ID 17015831 | Christmas ©
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